Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Hobbies Come in All Shapes and Sizes and Rolling Papers

I’m looking out my room window (room 202A, floor 1, don’t ask). The view is pretty crappy and a trail goes by every 10 minutes. But what can you expect with an 8 a night cost of living. I’ve had a lot of time on my own the last couple weeks so I’ve taken up a few hobbies.

The first, rolling cigarettes, which don’t have a filter and make me light headed as all get out, so I only smoke few. So far I suck, as you would expect. It’s like having to make a sandwich before you eat it. LAME. I’m from America.  

The second, now don't call me crazy, is learning Korean, which for lack of a better analogy is like learning a new language.

It’s not as easy as learning Spanish though; something that I couldn’t even manage to do after 4 years of classes. You have to learn a whole new alphabet which is called Hangul and spelled looks like this… 한글. See what I mean. Six characters broken up into two syllables to make one amazingly difficult word and in turn making up one very difficult language. Thank you Tower of Babel goers.  Dangun should of made the official language of Korea English when he had a chance. It’s a joke…God should of.

Another hobby that I’ve started that I’m much better at than learning Korean is dancing in clubs.

I’ve already started learning some new moves. There’s “sweat real bad to detract all the girls.” Another “dance all alone in a seductive manner trying to allure men and when it works give them a ugly look and turn around” And my personal favorite, “Pay 120 Czech Crowns to come into the club and watch people dance” I’m still working on this one but it’s hard because I’m dancing.

Small-town America doesn’t understand dance clubs. I know because my entire 25 years of existence I’ve lived in small towns in America that have zero dance clubs. The occasional dance club that I have visited pales in comparison to dance clubs here in Prague; the best being the 5 Story Club.  

The first story: (as shown by a projector on the wall): Radio hits. On this floor people from all countries dance to the most famous radio dance music in the world, American, while men stand peering down on the dance floor looking really really really cool.  

The second story: Dance music. On this floor a 9 foot alien projects red lasers all around the smoke machined room while people dance to the most annoying techno music you’ve ever heard. On the side of the room are 20 boxes lit with black lights to dance on with lasers coming down from the ceiling. It’s a site to see sober. I can’t even imagine what I’d be like being high.

The third storyBlack music. While I’m not sure what they mean by black music judging from the things they play I’m assuming its bump and grind music. Although I’ve heard the occasional Gwen Stefani song who I’ve pretty sure isn’t black. Maybe they mean music that black people listen to which would explain the floor being packed with everyone but black people. I think I’ve seen all of 2 black people in all of Prague since I’ve been here…okay okay…maybe 3.

The forth storyOldies. Who knew Europeans loved Bon Jovi more than me? All the oldies are of course from the west because what I’ve learned is that no one made music besides Westerners in the 60’s and 70’s. Everything from I Get Around by The Beach Boys to Hey Jude by The Beatles. I don’t spend that much time on this floor because I’ve never figured out how to dance to Hey Jude. Apparently all of Europe knows how because this is always the most packed floor of the house. The top picture is of this floor.   

The fifth storyChill music. Or as I like to call it “sweat music” because I did not one second of chilling when I was on the floor. The DJ plays main room house music and dudes just dance. They aren’t looking for girls. They aren’t looking to be cool. They. Just. Let. Loose. So, that’s what I did. It’s not like an Urban Sophisticates show (YO WINGS) but it’s close.

There’s a total of 10 bars in the whole club, 20 different rooms, and 500 Italian men.

My one rule of going to a dance club is this: You must bring at least one girl with you. Love. War. 

Things to think about:
-How your emotions can change so quickly from one second to another.
-You don't need an iPod to start exercising.
-Ignore grammatical mistakes in my blogs. I hate commas and knowing how to use them. 

Things to listen to:
On a side note I’d like to say that one song I’m listening to now that isn’t American and is number one in every country save America is We No Speak Americano by Yolanda Be Cool.

Things to read:
The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis (if you're smart enough)

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